27 Sep 2007

random bites

alright. this is another crazy post. dont say you werent warned. havent a clue whats going on. days are passing. night turns to day and day turns to night. i thought i would sleep a lot to get away from how things are but youre haunting my dreams now. why would you want to do that, i ask. no reply. last night i dreamt of you and woke up at 2. couldnt sleep after that. things arent fun anymore. life isnt fun. when was life ever fun? it began to gain speed when you were around but thats about it. now its just dragging along like an an old man with arthiritis. but there IS gold in them hills so im not losing heart [coldplay] uff. i dont want to talk to anyone. i dont have the energy to do anything. omg. i just want to sit in my room and kill myself with thoughts of you and i might die. not that im not already dead...but kill myself further i guess. hmm. im such a fuckin retard. i want to give up on everything. what is the point in being hopeful, believing in your dreams, keep holding on, being optimistic? perhaps you dont know how much i love you. omg. here i go talking shit again. i need a kick-ass dose of optimism. maybe i should start drinking. but you remember that thing i told you? if i ever drink it will be with you. maybe i need to forget everything or maybe i need to keep holding on like i have been. but hope is wearing out and im kinda drowning whilst frowning. i would love to keep holding on...if only i could gaze into the future and if i couldnt see you, i would resort to just sitting in my room. write crazy poetry and calmly accept my status as a psycho. omg. im losing my marbles. whatever. dafiz

zaza at 4:50 pm

6 angels shot me

6comments

at September 27, 2007 Anonymous so inlove said...

how about I feel the same? I'm going crazy also and all I want is to see you. Hang in there and be strong. What a freaking complicated life!!!!!!! All I do is sit and do nothing and don't want to do anything either, am also losing it.
romeo and juliet, but plesae change the ending, yes?

 
at September 27, 2007 Blogger Bonne Foi said...

You hit the bullseye. I feel exactly the same but dont think I could have written it so candidly and straight... Life is hurting like hell but I still want to hold on to my hopes... Coz the feeling of being with her even in my dreams is so wonderful.

 
at September 27, 2007 Anonymous Anonymous said...

how about I feel the same? I'm going crazy also and all I want is to see you. Hang in there and be strong. What a freaking complicated life!!!!!!! All I do is sit and do nothing and don't want to do anything either, am also losing it.
romeo and juliet, but plesae change the ending, yes?

 
at September 27, 2007 Blogger zazafeefi said...

so inlove: yeah, why dont you be all brave and tell me who you are?!

bonne foi: ahh thanks, im glad someone feels the same..yeah the feeling of him being with me in my dreams is more than wonderful..if only i could keep dreaming forever eh..

anon: youre the 'so inlove' person - who are you?!

 
at September 28, 2007 Blogger Ashu said...

Aww girl, you need a hug a tight one from me. come let me give one to you.

try to divert your mind somewhere else and just just do something different.

i know the words dont make any difference, yet try them!!!

 
at September 28, 2007 Blogger zazafeefi said...

ashu: i got a few hugs frm the most wonderful person i know..anyways i feel a lot better now..thanks

 

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