25 Nov 2007im just not cut in the right places. neither do i sparkle as brightly as happy faces. im not a diamond. i never was. ive got streaks of mud on my face, a grazed knee with traces of blood trickling down it. ive got dirt in my nails, my hair is stringy and greasy. im wearing a big smile on my face and thats all that matters. then i wake up and reality sucks me back into a deep, dark abyss of nothingness, which has an entrance door but no exit. dreams seem like a million miles away yet i dare not sleep incase i dream of unrealistic happiness once again. i feel so trapped; torn between the past and the present and anxious about what the future holds. im trying to find a way out of the abyss, knowing my efforts are of no use. i almost deafen myself by screaming out my heart yet not one person hears me out. not one. not even one.
im home to a soul thats always burning
i own a brain thats always churning
zaza at 9:05 am
- at November 25, 2007 Pixie said...
It's a sinosodial curve, life is. There are highs, and lows, and then all that's in between. And the worst is when you realise that you can exist in between, and it's all good.
You'll feel better, or you'll get worse-emotions I'm coming to realise are a state of mind we bring upon ourselves. So, make a choice eventually.
You'll be fine either way
Best wishes Zee
- at November 26, 2007 c e e d y said...
arent you too young to be so self retrospective - loosen up or else life will not be anything but a burden.....you can run but cannot hide - dreams will catch you unawares :)
- at November 30, 2007 Sameera said...
That was sooooo intense!